Marathon Heroes: "These are the things that define you ..."

I was watching this press interview with Kara Goucher after the NYC Marathon, and it was heartbreaking for me. [ Source ]

Kara Goucher finished 14th at the NYC Marathon with a time of 2:37:03. It was her big return since the 2013 Boston Marathon, and fans like myself were all looking forward to her doing well. Things did not go as planned though. For the first time in her running career, she "hit a wall" - that painful, unspeakable moment when the brain and body shut down and you truly struggle to carry on. She admitted in this video this is the first time she "hit a wall" running. I watched her break down, emotions overwhelming her. I imagine the kind of doubts and anguish going through her head when so many people had their hopes on her making a triumphant return after injuries and changing coaches.

“I’m really sensitive so it hurts,” Goucher said, wiping away more tears. “I know I am in great shape and can do great things. It’s like, ‘Well that sucked.’ I’ve worked really hard and have a lot of people behind me and I’m like, ‘That’s what it was?’ But that’s what it was. It just wasn’t great. It was really sucky, actually.

“This is the most pain I have ever been in my entire life” she continued. “Both physically and emotionally. It’s taken so much for me to get back here and so many people have invested in me so I feel a responsibility for that and then physically I have never felt like that before where I literally couldn’t move. It was not a good experience."

It was a most human moment. She was an Olympian, an elite runner, but even heroes struggle. I think we often forget that. After finishing the race, Kara Goucher broke down and wept. Meb Keflezighi, approached her and comforted her. Meb finished 23rd last year, but came back strong this year to finish 4th in the NYC men's race, and he won the Boston Marathon earlier this year. This is a guy who fell and tasted the ashes, but found it inside him to pick him up. Kara said:

“I talked to Meb about it and he said, ‘These are the things that define you and the experiences that make you appreciate the good times and make you work even harder,’” Goucher said. “He came up to me and I started crying and he started crying. Then he said, ‘Look at where I was last year and look at where I am now. I believe and don’t let this sway you from what you know you’re capable of.’

Heroes struggle too. We forget that. What makes them heroes is precisely because they struggle, and continue to get back up and fight harder. What makes them heroes is because they understand the struggle, and they work to lift others up.

 Stay strong, Kara. We believe in you. Stay strong, Meb. Both of you are heroes.

[ Source: @Adam_Goucher ]

MURAKAMI | Run To Live Life to the Fullest

“People sometimes sneer at those who run every day, claiming they'll go to any length to live longer. But don't think that's the reason most people run. Most runners run not because they want to live longer, but because they want to live life to the fullest. If you're going to while away the years, it's far better to live them with clear goals and fully alive than in a fog, and I believe running helps you to do that. Exerting yourself to the fullest within your individual limits: that's the essence of running, and a metaphor for life — and for me, for writing as whole. I believe many runners would agree”

― Haruki Murakami, What I Talk About When I Talk About Running

(Photo: Haruki Murakami, after finishing his first marathon from Athens to Marathon in the blistering summer heat - July 18th, 1983. [Source])

Surrender is Not An Option

Great Eastern Women's Run 21.1 km Finisher medal

I earned this Finisher Medal for this year's Great Eastern Women's Run Half Marathon. 21.1 km, or 13.1 miles.

I started my journey as a runner last November. I went out one morning, ran for a while, and was defeated after less than 15 mins. I ended up walking home breathless, with the full awareness of how out of shape I was.

One year later, I find myself finishing my first half marathon. It was a humbling journey. Running is painful, and there were a few injuries along the way. I learnt so much, and yet there's still so much more to learn.

I am still limping a little from my shin splint and IT band sprain (suspected). When I showed up for my half marathon last Sunday, I just told myself to try my best - and finish. I asked myself, what can I do, if surrender is not an option?

I did think about not showing up. Sleep in and rest, I told myself. Rest.

I showed up anyway. I am glad I did.

I am not fast, but I managed to run and walk my way through a half marathon.

What am I capable of, if surrender is not an option?

A lot.

Running to Train Myself

“If you’re trying to defeat the human spirit, marathoners are the wrong group to target.”

I read this quote on Facebook soon after the Boston Marathon bombing. Since I've been running, I am only feeling the amount of discipline and will it takes to train for a marathon. To complete 26.2 miles in the Boston Qualifying time takes more than running 26.2 miles. It takes years of focused practice, who knows how many thousands of miles ran - not to mention the aches and pains that came with it all. Marathon runners take all of this in, and they still continue.

This is why I want to continue running. This is a training of will. If I can do this, I know I can do anything. I'm tired of giving up. Tired of not following through. Tired of letting myself down.

Gratitude | Getting my run in tonight

I admit I didn't feel like running today. I did a bit of cycling, which I had intended to compensate for the non-running, even though I was supposed to do a long run this weekend. Sometimes you just struggle against the run.

Somewhere along the way, I got myself outside at 9 pm and just ran. Clocked 3.47 miles. Not a lot, but it's great considering just last October, I was breathless after 5 minutes of running. Running is as much a mind exercise. I had intended to run longer, but the moment I came out from the park connector, my mind just told myself I am done. And I was. The mind has strategies to keep the body from tiring itself out. But that's okay. I ended up doing some grocery shopping before heading home.

Let us just be grateful for those days when you did not want to do something, but you did it anyway, because you need to keep your word to yourself. When I keep faith with myself, I align my actions with my intentions. That's who I want to be. Little by little, just by showing up. Not a big deal to run 3 miles, I know. But it's one step forward in a life. That's what it means. And that's important.

(Night scene from my run earlier)

RUNNING | Safari Zoo Run 2013

So I've been pretty quiet recently. Good news is - my left knee seems to have healed somewhat. I can run again, but I'm taking things slow. I also just completed my first 6K run of the year today. It's the Safari Zoo Run 2013, in memory of our grand dame, Ah Meng. (I blogged about her passing here)

I like animals, although I have to admit I haven't been to the zoo in a long time. But a Sunday spent running in the zoo? Awesome way to spend a Sunday, I say!

As expected, it was a lovely Sunday run, lots of families bringing their children along. I really admire the parents that sign their kids up for runs like these. I think it beats going to the malls on weekend, where you just shop and purchase things. We need to set better examples to children on the fun of running and just moving. And there's also the animals. I like the animals, especially the big cats.

[The tiger was pacing back and forth restlessly. I was in the middle of the run, but decided to stop to take a picture]

It was a relaxing run. No competition. We ran through the zoo, and every now and then when we saw the animals, people would stop to take pictures. I did too. :)

I have to confess though: I haven't been to the zoo since I was a student and we did field trips to the zoo. I was expecting all fresh air and nature for today's run. Instead, it was the smell of animals and manure. There were also manure on the grounds. Yeah, welcome to the real world. But all it well.

It started to rain towards the last leg of the run, but it didn't dampen our mood. I went back to the zoo after my run to check out the other animals. It was fun and very wet. Now my muscles are aching. I will take it easy tomorrow.

Meanwhile, check out my finisher medal for today's run:

Knee Still Aching

It's Thursday and my left knee doesn't seem to be healing as fast I would like. I'm getting a little worried actually. I don't want to miss the Terry Fox Run. The student of dharma in me knows I need to let go of trying to control the situation. But I am human. I am afraid that if I don't show up this Sunday, it's as good as admitting defeat. I don't like to surrender. Damn.

A Bad Knee and a 5K Run this Sunday

Confession: It has been about 3 days since my last run. I seem to have pulled something in my left knee during yoga class on Sunday. Well, it feels like a pull because it feels tight around the side of the knee. I'm getting a little worried, not because the knee is hurting, but because I have my first 5K run this coming Sunday. My priorities are silly sometimes.

Here's the T-shirt for the Terry Fox Run this Sunday:

I thought myself to start small. I am still building up my stamina for running. But while I know I am not a fast runner yet, I will finish. Even if I have to walk to the end.

I signed up for the run not because I felt I was ready, but because I know if I keep waiting for myself to be ready, I'm never going BE ready. Sometimes, you just have to just dive right in and do it. You just have to show up and do it.

Bought a pair of Brooks Pure Cadence Running Shoes

I have a confession: I bought a new pair of shoes today.

As my friends would ask, "Didn't you just bought a pair? The ones for your flat-feet?"

Yes, I did. But I didn't like how those pair look, and they were cushioned, and I love the way minimalist shoes feel. So I did some research online and decided on a pair of Brooks PureCadence for women.

Call it stubbornness, call it whatever. Yes, I was motivated to start running after reading Born to Run, so yes, I am a fan of minimalist running. (But isn't the simplicity of running part of its appeal?)

Maybe I just enjoy shopping (actually, I don't). But I do know how I feel about minimalist shoes. It feels comfortable. My feet enjoy that closer contact with the ground. The pair of Brooks Pure Cadence shoes have that minimalist feel but it also caters for the flat-footed, like myself. I know what the guy at the Running Lab told me that I need. But I also know we need to listen to how we feel.

Fact: I am flat-footed. A yoga teacher made me walk around for a bit one day in class, and he pointed out to me that I shuffle my feet when I walk. This means I don't get to exercise the muscles at the bottom of my feet, which is why I am flat-footed. I get the reason why I need motion control shoes - because of the risk of over-pronation due to my flat-foot. But - I also know keeping my feet all locked in by cushioning isn't going to help me work those sole muscles. The final decision is between me and my feet. I would like something with a low-drop.

I ran with my new shoes this evening, and it felt good. I have been trying to apply the ChiRunning technique to my own running form lately, but I am going to confess again (tonight is full of confessions) that I don't get a lot of it. So again, I am paying attention to how I feel when I run. Do my legs hurt when my feet land a certain way? What happens when I change my gait? This is one of those times when my yoga practice kicks in, and I just started paying attention to how my body ought to feel, about the alignment of my hips, my back, even how open my heart feels when I run. It's almost like doing yoga, just running. And it works, and it felt great - because running should feel natural. I will be sticking with these pair of shoes, and alternating them with my other shoes every week.

I leave with this quote from Born to Run:

“Vigil couldn't quite put his finger on it, but his gut kept telling him that there was some kind of connection between the capacity to love and the capacity to love running. The engineering was certainly the same: both depended on loosening your grip on your own desires, putting aside what you wanted and appreciating what you got, being patient and forgiving and undemanding.” ― Christopher McDougall, Born to Run: A Hidden Tribe, Superathletes, and the Greatest Race the World Has Never Seen

New Running Shoes for the Flat-Footed

I went to the local Running Lab for an analysis of my running and walking gait. I always knew I was flat-footed, which they confirmed. (D'uh). What I didn't really realize was that I walk with heel strikes but when I run, I do land with the front of my feet - which is actually ok.

The guy at the Running Lab recommended a pair of motion control shoes for my flat-foot. I went into the Running Lab wearing my Nike Free 3+, and I loved the mobility and comfort of the Nike Free series. The idea of having to switch to something more restrictive, with more "control" - just didn't sit well with me. As the guy at Running Lab remarked, "Change is difficult." Well, yeah. It's hard to give up comfort, especially when it's about your footwear.

But I tried a pair of ASICS GEL Foundation 11, and they fitted okay. These are recommended for wide-footed heavy over-pronators. I still don't believe I pronate, but hell, I'll try it out for a bit, see how it fee.

Yoga for Long-Distance Runners

Found this while web-surfing. Seven tips for applying the principles of yoga to running, transforming it from a sport to a practice.