Thank you everyone for the very kind words. Right now my mother is focusing on my grandmother's condition instead. I think it helps her avoid thinking about her own illness.
I've been ranting a bit recently due to the emotional roller-coaster. At work, I'm trying to keep frustrations under control. To keep sane, I've been going online to look at crazy cat pictures. You will see a lot of them on this blog for a while, I think.
My mother will be having some tests done before her next doctor's consultation. That's when we'll know for sure what's in store. I insisted on being there with her; she insisted on going to the doctor's alone. We argued over it. She think she's winning but I'm going to take leave from work to show up anyway.
My mother believes parents should protect their children from the bad things in life. Part of my difficulties with my mother is how I felt smothered by her over-protectiveness. Even now, when I am in my (very early) thirties, my mother still feels she has to protect me from her illness.
As for the dispute about my grandmother's hospital bills, I told my mother the other day I will meet her family with her. She told me that was no need. I rebutted, with emphasis:"No. You're nice. I'm not."
But she went alone anyway. (She felt I will make things ugly for Eldest Uncle - yes, that's the point. I enjoy making things difficult and ugly for people who bully my mother).
So, what came out of the meeting: It seems we are going to forgo the painful and unnecessary surgery for my grandmother. Instead, it will be hospice care - to be paid for by my mother. My mother agreed to it. My grandmother is dying and she was too tired to fight over money and hospital bills.
Meanwhile, I have started looking at my own expenses, and trying to cut down. That means less book buying, less movies - and eating at cheaper places. The greatest concern right now is my Turkey trip, which will be my biggest expenditure. But it will also probably be one of my last major holiday for a long time. Let us see how it goes.