Friday, March 14, 2008

MEME | The Five Kind thing Meme

Stefanie tagged me for a meme. It's actually a good question to ask myself -- have I done enough kind things for myself and those around me?

The Five Kind Things meme:

  1. List five kind things you do for yourself.
  2. List five kind things you do for your closest friend, partner or child.
  3. List five kind things you have done for a stranger.
  4. Have fun!
  5. Tag five people.

List five kind things you do for yourself.

  1. Forgive myself for my mistakes. This is one of the most important steps I had to learn to be happy. I am a highly critical person, and my expectation from myself and others is high. Learning to allow myself to make the occasional mistakes helped me gain perspective. What I also learned from this is that someone who is willing to forgive herself will find it easier to forgive others.
  2. Signing up for the membership at my yoga studio. My 2-year contract at the yoga studio is expensive, and there are some things with the administration that could be improved. But it allows me to learn from some very experienced and inspiring teachers. It has also helped me build up a regular practice.
  3. Taking leave from work. When I first started working, I was the kind of employee that did not take leave unless I had to. I brought work home and I would even come back to work on my off-days. In a nutshell -- I had no life. These days I allow myself "Mental Health Breaks" when things feel too stressful. And I travel. I am A LOT happier.
  4. Wear only shoes that I am comfortable in. I'm on my feet a lot, so footwear has to be comfortable. I have seen too many pairs of feet murdered by high heels for the sake of vanity. Why? If those shoes are not sensible, they are not touching my feet. I have Feet of Gold.
  5. Walking away from toxic/abusive relationships. Sometimes I need to remind myself that I deserve to be treated with respect and kindness -- and find the strength to talk away from emotionally draining relationships.

List five kind things you do for your closest friend(s). I'm going to answer for several of my closest friends. No names mentioned though.

  1. Pay attention to she has to say, especially when she is angry. I don't do it enough though. Sometimes my friend seems unreasonable, but somewhere in the "unreasonable" demands is a need or pain that has to be addressed. Often, I have to read between the lines to find out what she is really asking for.
  2. Watch her company's plays. When she was working for a theatre company, she was always asking her friends to come to their productions, and to bring friends. I don't always like the stuff I watch, and I am not trained in drama. But at least I know what she's talking about when she talks about her work -- which she is passionate about. And sometimes, I actually learn a few things.
  3. Telling her she has bad breath. I know this sounds horrible of me – but she needs to know. Usually people finds it embarrassing to say it directly. I try to break it to her as gently as possible, so that she can do something about it.
  4. Change seats during a film. This happened during a film where my friend and I bought tickets separately and we were sitting at different rows. Before the film started, she messaged me out of the blue and asked to change seats. As it turns out, her ex's girlfriend is seated near her, and that girlfriend was staring daggers at her. So we changed seats.
  5. Sticking around even when she is more than 45 minutes late. Actually, I have a few friends who are chronic late-comers, so this applies to more than one person. I am not a patient person, so I guess by making me friends with these late-comers, the universe is trying to teach me patience. The truth is: I will wait because I believe they are worth waiting for.

List five kind things you have done for a stranger.

  1. Help a child find his lost parents. Well, the child knows where he is. It's the parents who are clueless.
  2. Act as an impromptu "translator". Domestically, it's usually for an elderly person who might not know English. When I was in China and Tibet, I had the opportunity to serve as a translator for a number of English-speaking tourists who could not communicate with the locals.
  3. Brought someone to her job interview. I was on my way to meet some friends one day when I overheard a lady asking for directions from a group of young men, who gave her the wrong directions. I decided I couldn't just walk away, so I approached her and ended up bringing her personally to the place. Turns out she was going for a job interview. It would have been bad to be late.
  4. Talked someone into coming back for yoga class. There was a girl who attended a Hot Yoga class for the first time and she threw up. Later I happened to talk to her in the locker room and she told me she wasn't going to come back for yoga anymore, not when she felt so bad. We talked, and I shared with her my own early experiences with yoga, and how maybe she should try other classes to see what suits her better. It's been about a year and I still see her around the studio from time to time.
  5. Help them find a book. Technically, it's not part of my job description. But I feel good when someone manage to find the books they have been looking for. On another note, I don't like it when staff working in bookstores misinform their customers.

Okay, if you're interested, please go ahead.

4 comments:

Dorothy W. said...

I SO agree with you about the comfortable shoes. I don't even own a pair of heels -- I just won't do it. And taking breaks from work is important too -- for me it's a little different because it's hard to take breaks when the semester is in full swing, but what I need to do it enjoy the breaks I'm given (winter and summer breaks) as much as possible. I really do need that down time!

Dark Orpheus said...

Dorothy Yay to sensible shoes! :)

I don't get heels and I never will. Do they actually make the legs look better? When it causes so much pain?

stefanie said...

Thanks for playing. I knew you'd have good answers! I'm with you on the sensible shoes. I hate shoes and would live barefoot if I could. Forgiving yourself for mistakes is a wonderful kindness. And what a good friend you are!

Dark Orpheus said...

Stefanie Thanks!
Actually, I go around barefoot at home -- which is why it's great yoga don't need shoes.

If I was a Care Bear, I hope to be Friend Bear. :)