Monday, March 20, 2006

Life, and Being Dismissed During Morning Coffee

You know one of those sms "dialogues" where you're obviously not on the same wave-length with the other party?

Was on my way to work this morning when a series of sms came in. A friend read a book and felt it's just so her. Mention of Dostoevsky's Underground Man, and the over-consciousness that somehow makes us unable to function in life.

I replied that life can be simple, but simple does not equate as easy. But I think somewhere my friend misunderstood me, and her reply was a little abrupt. I felt dismissed, that before she made an effort to understand my point, it was rejected as unworthy.

This is not the first time we had unpleasant exchanges like these. Though it still stings, life goes on.

I believe she thought I was giving a simplistic answer: that life can be categorized as "Yes," "No," and "Maybe."

I never said that. What I meant was, we claim life is complicated and difficult, because we are not courageous enough to accept or to sacrifice in order to make life better.

We blame the circumstances of our existence on everything else, never really stopping to consider that our choices complicate the circumstances itself.

It is not as simple as "we can't choose." Rather, we did not want the options presented to us. Or, we lack the imagination or power of will to create alternatives.

Refusing to choose, is also a choice.

I have said, simple does not mean easy. Simplifying your life takes long term commitment, stamina and immense strength. It's the hardest thing in the world to do.

In sms, I hate long answers. But in general, I hate long debates.

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