Sunday, May 22, 2011

Surrendering Aggression

Love is a state of mind without a center or self. Therefore, it doesn’t feel threatened. Since, it is not afraid it isn’t obliged to judge everything on the basis of what it stands to lose or gain in the relationship. So, love is able to simply appreciate the present moment without seeking ownership or destruction. It is free of aggression… This sort of open door policy is generosity. Of course, this is scary from a certain point of view…

The ego devotes all of its time and energy to keeping the door shut. However, the door swinging open is always a possibility precisely because there is a door! This possibility drives the ego mad or gives rise to a a certain kind of paranoia. On the other hand, this door is our “soft spot” or “basic goodness.” It is the indestructible quality of sanity. The door is an eternal reminder that sanity is all that there is.

We could be in the midst of a knock down drag out fight with our significant other. In our rage we say something hurtful, and then BOOM! We see it in their face. We made them sad; their feelings are hurt. Our selfish/ self-centered agenda has destroyed itself. Egocentricity is unsustainable. Life shatters all of our silly little selfish plans. Sanity immediately recognizes this sadness in the other, and begins to express itself. Insanity is revealed to be nothing more than sanity misunderstood, and we remember that we love this person, and that is all that matters! It is a soft spot…

The most subtle expression of generosity is mindfulness, or simply observing. Listening. Watching. Generosity is participation free of aggression or the neurotic need to control. No need to grasp or defend- simply listen. Life is very spacious; all we have to do is acknowledge it. Basic goodness is the potential embedded in the human condition that invites us to do just that.

~ Chogyam Trungpa

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